To be or not to be… That is the question. To be the new and improved me requires constant diligence but the push pull of the new verses the old is sometimes really exhausting. I’ve been given glimpses into my future and then nothing…. and in the nothing is when I feel like a loose faith. My energy starts to die in my body and the cloud comes over me. Hormones it could be, but whatever it is… it is a crap feeling…. Is this being inside the tunnel on the hero’s journey? Last week the train left the station and this week it is having trouble moving through the tunnel.. filled with dense coal air… I’m finding it hard to breathe.. yes the light is at the end.. but I’m telling you this thick air filled with coal particles is a little challenging. At the same time it’s become clear that I really haven’t made a clear choice. I have a studio filled with art supplies that I used to make my work years ago and I can’t seem to let it go. I have moved on to clay and other works now and have been expressing creatively through this medium and have based my business on it for now… Who is it that I really want to be? What is it that I really want to be doing? I await the answer from within.